Sadderday

by Jay Wonder

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about

2023 Self-Conscious

lyrics

Yeah

Above my head is a
Black cloud; overcast, wit' a chance of rain
Wonder swarmed wit' thunderstorms; I was handed pain
Damaged brain, so a loner; given coldest shoulders
Tryna survive in a young world, growin' older
I think I used to be happier, but I can't remember
Now, I'm askin' ya for more, when you hand me liquor
Miss me with the phone calls; I ain't pickin' up
I'm busy twistin' up
I'm feelin' sad
I'm feelin' bad
Thought I was healin'; I'm peelin' the scab
Now, bleedin' again
Seekin' revenge
Can't see the beginnin', so schemin' to end
Dream of the fin
Peace to my friends
Love to my mother; at ease, to my kin
Sisters, my brothers, my cousins, I'm sorry to all them; like autumn 'cause leavin' a win
Off of the tree
Into the dirt
Grin in the hearse
Sittin' in church
Preacher wit' sermon and spittin' a verse
Rid me of sin and get rid of the hurt
I done
Lost my mind, wonderin' where did the time go
What you think I got this 9 fo'? Bang

It's the end of the weak
Lately, I been fendin' for peace
It got me wishin' I was never conceived
Mentally free
Dealin' wit' the pressure to be
It got me stressin'; hold my head in defeat
'Cause life is messin' wit' me
Yeah
Life is messin' wit' me
Yeah
It's the end of the weak
Lately, I been fendin' for peace
It got me thinkin' I'll be better deceased

I'm so ugly
My soul's hungry
Nobody know me
Or love me
But they judge me 'cause I don't get money
They down me
No one even really cares about me
The world is a better place without me, so I'm outtie
I'm cynical, I do not fit into, different dude, indigo seed
Wish I wasn't me
Pitiful; I'm so forgettable, minuscule, little ol' me
Itchin' fo' peace
Get low and believe that this globe is so green; it's like Namek
And only way thinkin' gon' cease, if the .38 special; I'm hit wit' the cannon like Piccolo beam; sheesh
They say life about trials and tribbies
Why try, if it's iffy?
Why lie like it's pretty?
Voila like epiphany hit me
My mistakes weigh so heavy on me, none of my triumphs uplift me
I'm just existing
Sittin' in doubt
Thinkin' about
How I feel like I'm just stuck in submission by Ricky, The Flair, while everyone figured it out
I'm messagin' Jesus
Pray, when I send, that it reaches
All while the sedative seep
I'm headed to sleep
My strength is depleted
Sadderday; end of the weak; peace

It's the end of the weak
Lately, I been fendin' for peace
It got me wishin' I was never conceived
Mentally free
Dealin' wit' the pressure to be
It got me stressin'; hold my head in defeat
'Cause life is messin' wit' me
Yeah
Life is messin' wit' me
Yeah
It's the end of the weak
Lately, I been fendin' for peace
It got me thinkin' I'll be better deceased

credits

released September 4, 2023
Produced by A Broke Ass White Boy
Recorded, mixed, & mastered by Jay Wonder
Artwork by Jay Wonder

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